The text narrates a man’s internal struggle regarding his younger sister’s care. The details were revealed in a Reddit post, removed twice.
The original poster (OP) was committed to taking care of his sister, but his wife disagreed. When their father passed away, leaving the sister without a guardian, the OP and his wife had been married for two years.
Due to a significant age gap, the OP is more like a father to his sister than an elder brother. She was only eleven when their father left on a trip.
The OP and his wife had no children and no plans to start a family. This posed a problem when deciding what to do with the sister after their father’s death.
After the loss, they had to make tough decisions. Unfortunately, these decisions led to unexpected conflicts. The OP explained:
“My father passed away from pancreatic cancer. There are 2 options for my sister: either I take her in or my uncle [dad’s brother]. So we asked her who she wanted, and she chose me. Here is the problem: My wife and I decided that we did not want kids.”
Both men agreed that it was essential for the young girl to express her preference for her residence. She chose to stay with the OP and his wife.
However, the wife made it clear that she didn’t want children, and taking in the sister would mean they had a child. This led to difficulties.
The wife argued that since the sister’s uncle could adopt her, neither she nor her husband should be obligated to take her in.
The OP didn’t want to force his sister to stay with the uncle as she expressed a desire to stay with him. Since their father passed away, he wanted to ensure her recovery.
The OP and his wife had a heated argument. Eventually, the OP told his wife that he would let his sister stay with them, even if it meant divorce. After some silence, they discussed it again and decided to part ways.
The wife said, “You really are choosing your sister over me.” The OP accepted her perspective but didn’t want to discuss it further. His focus was on his sister.
That was their last conversation. The OP stated that he had been living with his sister for a week, finding it challenging but fulfilling.
Commenters on the original post generally supported the OP’s decision to care for his sister, viewing his wife as insensitive for refusing to help a homeless teenager. Some suggested having a will to designate guardians for their own children in case of untimely passing.
Another user shared a similar experience, where their half-sister took them in after their parents’ death but didn’t make them feel welcome.
Some users believed that the OP and his wife should have divorced, as their sister would have sensed any hostility if she had stayed.
Others without children sympathized with the wife, stating that they would also consider it a deal-breaker.
A few argued that the wife would effectively become a mother figure if she helped raise the sister, even if she didn’t want to.
One commenter felt the wife had been unfair in accusing the OP of choosing his sister over her.